Sasquatch 

​Blurring effects by Sasquatch 

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Happy 48th Birthday, Allegra!

Another year, another filter.  It’s been a fun several months watching you, my friend.  It’s been even more fun watching the plethora of naive idiots drooling over your photos with more blur effects than the Sasquatch.

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Most people mellow in their old age, but you… well, no.  For a while I thought you’d pretty much shut down, but here you are whining about your “friends” on social media abandoning you. Again, playing the victim.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

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You never endorsed Trump for president? Who the fuck do you think you are thinking you can endorse anyone for president? You attack people for far less, and when it comes back on you, you lose your shit.  Relax, little girl.  It’ll all be ok. Go have some cake.

Again, happy birthday… here’s to hoping you’ll stop acting like a fucking teenager on snapchat and get a life. Before you turn 50.

Grabbing life by the pussy

It’s been a while since we’ve posted because sometimes life is just more interesting.  Not a whole lot to update y’all on, but from Allegra’s Facebook and Twitter, it’s clear she’s gone full tilt into supporting her “friend”, Donald Trump (whom she knows personally, of course).

Just perusing her Twitter…

I simultaneously had two thoughts on this: 1) I’m sure it’s been so SO much longer, because … eeww; 2) I wonder how she would react if a man were to walk up to her, kiss her, and grab her by the pussy?

 

Or… you know, get off social media and go get yourself a job?  Hey, I completely agree women are paid less and should not be.  This is fact.  However, for someone to demand “get me equal pay” and have the lifestyle Allegra has?  Nope.  You deserve what you have, bankruptcy and all.

 

Umm… yes.

 

A specific type of douchebag …

A kind reader mentioned Allegra’s Yelp account, which I had seen before, but pretty much ignored.  What caught me here, is the ready mentioned “… she’s seeking to get to the ELITE status …”.

Wait, what?  I thought Twitter only had Elite status??  If Yelp has it, then YES Allegra will want it.

So, after a little reading, it would make sense.  With Elite status she would get a little badge on her account, a lot more followers, and most importantly, some ass kissing from vendors who want a favorable writeup.

So I looked through her account.  If you’ve ever checked out Yelp (or any online rating service), you’ll see a disproportionate negative feedback ratio.  This is human nature.  We like to lash out and complain when we’re not happy, but document when we are?  Nah.

So here are Allegra’s stats:

Yelp statsJust a little one sided, aren’t they? This would lead me to believe that she’s using her online clout to show vendors that she will “give good Yelp”.  Presumably she’s get perqs as a result?  I’m not sure how that works.

You know all those hot Instagram chicks (no not Allegra, dumbass) that pose and mention “Bikini by ABC Swimwear”?  Well they get paid.  Sometimes in cash, other times in perqs.

What a Yelper.

 

And with that, I’ll leave you with this gem from Urban Dictionary <click for more>:

Yelper

Narcissistic Candy Empire 

The nature of Instagram is seeking validation.  Whether you’re  a photographer and posting your awesome sunset pics, or a teenager posting bathroom selfies, we all get off on the number of likes and/or comments.

How’s this one for you?

Four self-esteem, all identical.  FOUR.  And if that wasn’t enough, of course she has to tag herself. 

You’re an idiot, Allegra.

Instagram Fun

Another anonymous submission with some Instagram screenshots.  Again there isn’t much context, but it appears Allegra left a comment that was insulting, or interpreted as such.  What’s interesting here, is a lot of ass kissing from Allegra in the form of apologies and compliments, and a whole lot of comments from others offering their thoughts on her.  Mildly entertaining.

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See You Next Tuesday

It appears Allegra is still making friends on Instagram. Or Twitter. I don’t know. 😂
This was submitted anonymously.

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No idea about context here but it made me chuckle.